Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Donald Trump Is A Prick. Discuss.


THE MEEK SHALL INHERIT THE EARTH, someone apparently once said. But in the meantime, guys like Donald Trump, the egomaniacal property developer, will attempt to seize their land and turn it into an exclusive resort. Not content with building gaudy, over-priced condos and hotels on multiple continents, Trump wants to build a £1 billion golf resort in Scotland. Only trouble is, one of the families who presently live on the land - and have done so for generations - don't want to move. So, Donald is dealing with it in his usual gentle, bourgeois manner - he put out a press release calling the owner names:

In a statement issued from his New York offices last night, Trump said Forbes "has always been dirty, sloppy and unkempt in his personal appearance and demeanor [sic]. He is a loser who is seriously damaging the image of both Aberdeenshire and his great country.
"His property is a disgusting blight on the community and an environmental hazard, with leaking oil containers, rusted shacks and abandoned vehicles dumped everywhere. It is a very poor image and representation for the world to see of Scotland."
Trump seems to think that forcing people off their land and wearing a haircut that looks like a yorkshire terrier has taken up residence on his head is a much better image for the world to see. I would just like to take this opportunity to apologize to the people of Scotland for our continent having produced such a cretinous, bullying monster like Trump. I promise we will overthrow capitalism soon, take away all of Mr. Trump's properties and put him to work in a kitchen under the supervision of Gordon Ramsay, the "cursing chef" (no small prick himself).
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