Well, now poor Stephen is in Trinidad for the Commonwealth conference - that's a meeting of the countries that were once British colonies but still get together to make fun of the Queen and laugh at what a shit-hole the UK is these days. "Sun never sets on the British Empire? Ha. They can't even get enough hot water to fill their bathtubs."
It is something of a big deal, mind you, representing 53 countries with over 2 billion people. The British Empire was big once. So, to be kicked out of the club is really to be told that one-third of the world think you're a bunch of assholes. Well, that's what a coalition of politicians, campaigners and scientists are pushing for in Trinidad. Why? Because we suck when it comes to climate change. The folks in Alberta - the sphincter in the asshole that is our country, if you will - are happily digging up oil in the tar sands, which is several times more damaging than even regular oil extraction. And, oh yeah, we hand people over to be tortured in Afghanistan.
The coalition claims Canada is contributing to droughts, floods and sea level rises in Commonwealth countries such as Bangladesh, the Maldives and Mozambique. Clare Short, the former international development secretary, said: "Countries that fail to help [tackle global warming] should be suspended from membership, as are those that breach human rights..."
Saleemul Huq, a lead author for the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change, said: "If the Commonwealth is serious about holding its members to account, then threatening the lives of millions of people in developing countries should lead to the suspension of Canada's membership immediately."I have no trouble with the Commonwealth kicking us out. Go to town, embarrass us. We should be embarrassed. It might help wake up a social movement in this country that could put the boots into Harper and his pro-war, anti-planet yahoos. I wonder if Stephen will still go to Copenhagen if we get turfed from Commonwealth and I wonder if he'll have to wear an "I'm a climate asshole shirt." Will people kick him and call him names? Ah, a boy can dream...